The Problem with Presence

I started meditating as a means by which to manage chronic pain. Meditation led me to Ayurveda and finally to a yoga mat. Of course the results were OMazing as you might know if you are following all the clinical studies now being published about the benefits of meditation, yoga and of course right nutrition and routine (Ayurveda).

We do have a problem, however, with these ancient Indian practices being incorporated into the life of about 10% of Americans or 20 million people.  The problem is being present. Now how can being present be a problem? Isn’t the goal to be present in your moment with no attachment to past or future? Don’t we want to be in the moment with deep one pointed focus on the object of our choosing? This object being the work or activity before us as well as the people we are engaged with.

The work and activity are not the issue. In fact, meditators are more productive and creative than non meditators so the one on one relationship between yoga and work or activity certainly improves. The people are the problem.  Only 10% of Americans are practicing. So, 90% of the other humans in a yogi’s life are not practicing and are not present.

What do I notice personally?

I have more time than others. Sure… I like to spend time alone and there is always a yoga class to go to, a garden to weed, a blog to write and the work of owning these studios to do, but regardless of how busy my schedule or calendar looks, I simply have more time. I feel like a social outcast watching everyone rush rush rush rush rush rush rush. There is an insane American and Workaholic (now recovered) inside of me telling me to task, but the yogi says no, embrace effortless ease and let all come to you. The effortless ease is working so why would I task? Guilt.

I feel lonely. I’ve gotten really good at being present for others. I notice when a person enters the room. I’m aware of their emotional state before they start speaking. I’m genuinely interested in what they are doing. I ask the right questions. I listen. I’ve come to understand 90% of others do not have this skill. I accept this and yet at the end of so many one sided conversations, I wish someone would allow me to speak of my day, my feelings and what is up for me. It’s not like I don’t  have any friends who listen well so I’m not dying of loneliness or anything but still I find I feel lonely in so many one-sided conversations.

I feel bored. The mundane no longer interests me. I’ve come to expect the mythical and magical in each moment. I’ve come to overanalyze the meaning of everything in the moment. Always looking for the big reveal of some hidden. I’ve switched to looking for the obvious and yet what is obvious is so mundane.

I don’t know how to fix this problem which is really just a problem of living during a great transition in our culture between the way things used to be and the way things will be.  I have no “5 secrets” bullet point list to share with you.  My only recommendation is to myself and it is  to keep practicing.

Perhaps all the above is the reason yogis become zealous passionately sharing and teaching yoga.  We just want more present people to validate our presence.  There is a story of God and why we are here as humans.  Apparently God (formless) got bored.  The formless couldn’t see, smell, taste, touch or hear.  There was nothing to do.  So God (formless) created human (form) giving human all the senses only so God could understand God.  We hold witness to each other as God seeing God.  Without 100% participation in the practice of presence we don’t exist.

“For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.” ~ Matthew

Peace, Pamela